Friday, October 16, 2009

O M G

Today I emailed Mc Cray's Tavern with the details of Mary and Danny's life for her birthday party in January.  I tried to send a link to the newpaper article from April with pictures of her and Tony in it.  I mistakenly opened the other one and saw her car.  I ended up laying under my desk crying uncontrollably but I did manage to close my office door so no one would hear.  There are not enough words in any language to describe what I felt when I saw that picture. It was only for a second or two until it registered what I had done.  But it was enough.  It was even worse that I had imagined.  My counselor told me there would be set backs in this journey and this is one of them.  I am numb.  I am empty.  I am broken.  I am, once again, seeing images that now are not speculation but fact.  I hate that man even more that I thought possible.  Mary could not have come out of that wreckage in one piece.  Now, you imagine what I saw.

Tomorrow Danny and I are going to Augusta for the weekend to the Mustang car show.  It will be better than sitting around here.

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