Pictures from my heart

Finally, finally, finally... I actually put glue to paper and created something.  Or rather something in the making, yet to be determined.  I bought some books and found one with DIY instructions.  But, I'm the one who has to physically do the steps.  Here's how it went:

Friday night I sat in my chair, watching a little TV, perusing all the books that I got in the mail this week.  I dreamed, wrote down the things I needed to buy to start creating, and picked up around the house a little.  After telling myself - I WILL DO SOMETHING TOMORROW, I went to bed.

Saturday morning I did chores until noon.  Then hopped in the car with my list and went off to Hobby Lobby.  Found a few things for exercise #1.  Went grocery shopping next and then home.  By this time it was 4pm.  I took everything down stairs and started looking through all my stuff I had boxed away.  I remembered things I can't find and found things I can't remember.  I have to say I have a lot of "stuff" down there.  Some of it kinda cool, some of it junk.  But this first exercise has proven to me that even junk can light a creative spark. I found the card. I then went back up and started cooking dinner, put it in the oven to cook, and went back downstairs to confront myself.  I've realized that if I don't actually DO something with all this stuff not only have a wasted my money and my time but I'll be a fraud to myself.  And one of life's lessons is to be true to yourself.

So, I started.  After the first step was finished I did not feel the energy flowing.  I felt like a loser who thinks they can do something when they really can't.  But, I did also realize that I have to get a little further to see any results.  I guess no one judges their own creations as someone else would.  "It doesn't matter what other people think as long as you like what you are doing."  I have to keep reminding myself of that.

The book also says to start an art journal. So, I am.  I've started two pages.  It says to work on more than one thing at a time or have multiple works at different stages of one theme.  I'm trying to do these lessons or exercises as if someone was expecting them or grading me on them.  Maybe Mary will.


Sunday morning I slept in till 9am.  Talked to Julie, did some more chores, and was waiting till noon so we could go pick up my other two rings.  Then Carol called to say she and Donnie were dropping by. We took of for the jewelry store and Joann's to buy some more stuff for my art.  I still hadn't done anything yet today.  Carol left and Julie went to work and I went downstairs.    Danny came down to see what I was doing.  He liked it.  That should have made me feel better  but my insecurities (yes, I have many) still hung out there like dirty socks.  He said exactly what I would say to someone else, "It doesn't matter what others think".  I looked at my art (now I can call it my art) and finally liked it.  It's not finished but it's cool.

But I can see I need to keep focused on completing the exercises or else I'll quit.  I'm working on a wine bottle too!